Indian Polygamist Expecting 31st Child

Assam(India):  Most family men just want a beautiful wife, a few adorable kids, and a big-screen HDTV.

80-year-old Hussain Ali, a frail skeleton of a man from Mohkuli village in Assam, has always sought much more, which is why he’s beaming with joy now that his third of four wives is pregnant with his 31st child.

The self-proclaimed polygamist already has 30 children, 15 of who have their own children to boast. Added to that, his 30th child is only two-months old and in need of frequent diaper changes.

In spite of his age, Ali remains quite content. In fact, during a recent interview with reporter Syed Zarir Hussain from the Indo-Asian News Service, he claimed to have zero regrets and even admitted to finding his wives to be “very good and caring.” He added, “It is all god’s gift and wish that I have a large family of four wives and 30 children.”

Ali’s wives share the same sentiment about him, even though they are each confined to a separate hut and afforded only one or two nights with him per week. Mohirun Nessa, his first wife and mother to 11 of his children, said, “He is a very nice man and very responsible.”

Ali’s only discernible stress stems from his inability to correctly remember the names of all his children. He was, in fact, unable to list all his children to Syed. He explained, “At times I do forget their names but recognize them from their faces.”

Divorce Seekers Must Compensate Workplace

Whilst many complain about strict company policies enforced by Catbert types bosses, none sounded as strange as this recent ruling by a Chinese company. Based in Chongqing, this workplace has enforced an unusual divorce regulation which asks the couple to compensate their colleagues.

Thus, any of the employees planning to tie the knot must agree to this company policy that paves way for later repayment.

According to this premarital agreement, the divorced couple are obliged to pay back any cash gifts handed in their work colleagues.

In this way, a divorce meant that their co-workers would receive double the amount they gave away as monetary gifts.

Jia Lichun, the company manager, justified this policy by noting that the younger employees were less committed to the idea of a married life.

According to him, there was higher probability of divorce because more than half those in his workplace were born in the 1980s, a generation that is considered immature in their handling of relationships.

Lichun’s view is not an uncommon one in modern day China. In fact, many researchers have also commented on the prevalence of this particular mindset, especially amongst China’s 80’s born folks.

In effect, they partly blame the controversial one-child policy which was introduced around the same time.

In their view, these children were pampered by family members where they learnt to become self-absorbed and got caught up with their own needs.

Families Bury Children Alive During Eclipse

Meerut(UP)India:  Not everybody celebrates a solar eclipse with a traditional pinhole projector. The folks in Meerut, Uttar Pradesh, India, for instance, like to commemorate the occasion by burying their children.

Local authorities in Meerut were shocked to discover their local graveyard filled with families on January 15th, the day of India’s latest annular eclipse.

What’s even more shocking is that the parents were burying their children’s body parts, in hopes that a combination of the eclipse and graveyard dirt would somehow cure their polio.

According to Manzoor Ahmed, one of the parents at the scene, “Solar eclipse affects everything. It has been scientifically proven.”

Shaheen Fatima, who buried her son’s leg in the dirt, further clarifies this strange behavior, saying, “We believe that the solar eclipse affects the soil also…the soil undergoes some changes during the eclipse and hence it may correct the deformity in the children.”

Dr. Vinod Mishra, a local astrologer, discredits these claims, noting that a solar eclipse has zero effect on soil, let alone disease.